Ending therapy

[krazyside.livejournal.com]

I've been in talk therapy with a private councellor for five years now. It hasn't worked. Maybe I have more insights and maybe it does help to have someonet to talk to, but at the end of the day I still get depressed, sometimes for weeks and weeks at a time, I still get hyper, I still get obsessive. On top of all that, hostility is beginning to creep into the therapeutic relationship. My cynicism is probably getting her down; while for my part I see almost everything she comes out with as an attempt to get me to blame myself for my problems.

It has been a long time and I have come to depend on this relationship. It is often the only contact I have all week.

What do I do? End the therapy? Last session I almost walked out. This completely passes her by of course. Nobody fucking gets just how horrible it can be to be me.