asylum_online | Sep. 1st, 2008

I haven't posted anything in a ridiculously long time. The update in a nutshell....

I still work with crazy teenaged girls in a group home.
I'm seeing a therapist, once again.
I'm also seeing a psychiatrist...and I'm supposed to be taking Zyprexa...
But I don't because it slows me down too much.
I DO take the Valium that the psychiatrist gave me.
I've been more manic than ever.
I still live with roommates.
I'm still with the same guy...it'll be 5 years soon.
My boyfriend and I adopted a wonderful cat a year and a half ago, her name is Dot.
I bought a new car.
I start school on September 6th...gonna get my bachelors in human services.
My best friend hates me because I'm "scared of everything."
In fact, I only have three friends.
I still bite my fingers.
My vitiligo is still spreading, slowly but surely.
I got more tattoos...and will be getting more.
I've been in 4 car accidents (not at fault) in the past 3 years....
3 of the accidents happened within a matter of 8 months.
I'm still alive.

I don't know. I can't really think of anything else right now. I'm trying to stay up as long as possible because I work Monday night...and I would like to be able to sleep during the day before work. Never happens. So right now I'm just listenin' to music...feeling like a complete loser because I have no one to talk to. It sucks so bad. I'm figuring maybe I'll be able to make some friends once I start school...even though I've never been good at making friends. I just don't fit in with anyone. I'm dreading certain things about school. The freakin' cafeteria is huuuge and there's so many people! I don't like eating in front of so many people. And I just feel so small and lost in there. So to avoid all that anxiety, I'm just gonna start buying lunch meats and whatnot so that I can make my own lunch...and eat by myself. Like I said...Loser. heh.

Okay, well, hopefully I'll be able to post more often now that I have a new laptop. My laptop is going back to Sony though....They sent me a 1,069.00 dollar NEW laptop with a dead pixel on the screen. So Fed Ex is picking it up on Tuesday and it'll take up to 7-10 days to fix and then another 2-3 until I get it back after it's fixed. Shitty. After I get it back, I'll be on more here more often....in between school and work. Crap man...I think I'm gonna just go to sleep. Pointless to stay awake so late when I can just take Valium to make myself fall back to sleep in the afternoon tomorrow. Love it!