Funny how those friends forget you when you're tired of their games

[rue42.livejournal.com]

I have to laugh about it. The ignorance and shallowness of it all.

Throughout high school I was the overweight gothy smart kid. I had hardly any friends. The ones I had were losers like me and therefore tortured just as often. And it was sad, really, that nobody wanted to see our potential. One of my best friends was an amazing artist. He moved to Seattle right after graduation. Another had the voice of a nightingale but knew she would be harassed in choir. She sang to herself during lunch. I haven't heard from her since senior year. And another produced the best poetry I have ever read outside of a hoity toity classroom.


( Cut for length )

(no subject)

[lium13.livejournal.com]

Some days
I feel positive and happy
Like nothing happened.

And then
I have these days
When I'm pretty sure
I'm borderline psychotic.

Today was one of them.
Where I just sit in class listening to everything.
But hearing nothing.

Wanting everyone to shut up.
And thinking how easy it would be to shut them up.

It isn't normal to stare at random objects and realize that you could kill someone with it?

I have come to realize that I have multiple sides

 

It's like I'm sitting on the fence.
One side is over coming all the pain and depression.
The other side is embracing it and taking it out on the world.
But I guess the fact I can realize this makes me okay and not crazy.

Sometimes I am uncomfortable with who's in my body