asylum_online | Jun. 8th, 2007

Ive been living in a colourful little place in my head lately. I dont have a clear grasp on reality, but I know that I am safe. I am content; I cant say that I am happy, but I can say that I am not unhappy.

Things are sometimes chaotic, but I find that beautiful things can come from the chaos and madness and I like it that way. Chaotic is a nice place to visit, I wouldnt want to live here though.

I feel that creative tingle again. Deep inside of me where my secrets and imagination sleeps. I want to create something, many things... any thing. And the time is coming, soon... I can feel it. I am going to make something beautful and strange. Well I hope its strange.

I feel prettier too. Not all the time, but just now; sitting here alone at 4:22 in the morning. I feel vulnerable... I think vulnerability is pretty. Ive been taking pictures again... its a good sign.

I am tired, but Im not sleepy. So I will look at pretty flowers on the internet and dream of the day when my body will be healthy, fit and colourful. It wont be soon, but one day it will be mine. Its a promise I made to myself a long time ago...

I hope you all are well. I miss you my loveys and Ive been thinking about you lately. I am going to try to come more often... I hope you havent forgotten me.

Xposted to my journal.